When You Don't Have Tim The Toolman Taylor To Blame

Linds and I have been talking about putting shelves up in the living room FOREVER now. So while on an errand from my brother (he's in San Diego mind you) I ventured into the IKEA neighborhood and figured I would just pick up the shelves and get the ball rolling.

Well the shelves sat in the living room for three weeks - staring us down. I blinked first and decided to trap linds into helping me hang them. Studying for law school demands distractions, right?

Well after an hour of research on how to find a stud (not that kind ...this time) we went for it - screw drivers a-flailing and sure enough - we found a sturdy stud. Now the nature of these shelves requires you mount the first bracket - slide the shelf into the bracket, slide the other end bracket on, and then mount that bracket to the wall. (Ha this really sounds like a heaving-bossom-throbbing-member paperback intro). Regardless, Linds and I figured out the first step - bracket mounted - and after an hour of agonizing - finally go to slip the shelf in - and wouldn't you know it - the shelf was two wide.

While linds is howling - I try to make my case - "but IKEA put the shelves and the brackets next to each other in the display aisle." "Did you think to measure? You didn't even look at the boxes did you?," she presses through belly laughs. I try once more to pass the blame with no avail. "We effed this in a serious way," she tells me.

No matter - we now have a very prominent member hanging from our wall. I came home to this sticky note the other day: "At least it's good for something." Tom Villa's got NOTHING on us!